Scene one:
A madman in a psychiatric. A bed, on one side and an adjacent table. He is wearing a heavily stained white top, a shoe on one leg and a different slipper on the other , a sock on the slipper leg, a tight knickers. A tattered hair. There is a tattered news paper on the table.
Madman: life is made of stones, even boastful humans are nothing but clay
shattered in their graves. One day the clay pot will break. I need a
break says the clay pot, so he retires. Retires like an army general.
(jumps on the bed) long since the battles have gone and the guns
(displays his hands as if he is about to shoot, immediately runs to
the other side of the bed) don’t shoot please don’t shoot me. Don’t
you know me, Don’t you know me!( runs back to the soldiers
side) I know you, only when I take away your human rice, your
human beings, you bloody human beans.
(pauses) soldiers are the best you know, not this agbada agbada men. Let me think for all of you, since all of you are mad anyway!. The devil stained my shovel is better than the new soap washing it. The amala without soup, in rancour, is better than smiling in hungry disguise.
I am sick ooo, BBC, EN TII EH EH, WHATAVER, BLA BLA BLA, PEE DRI PEE, Air CONDISHIONER, yangan yangan yangan. Invite me to the state house, I will mistake it for a toilet like you.
You! wura, wara , jara jara.
Labe ile mi when I AM NOT MAD?, the doctors said that my illness is expensive . At what expense? Oh oh, Saudi here I come!
Common ta le vu, get out! I don’t want a French doctor , before you find contracts in oil and gas, gassing all of us with your oyinbo fart. We are thin here oo, we are not fat, we have kidney problem, skin cancer, pericardium ditties, cholera, leprosy, et al et al, pick your choice.
Salam aleikun, salam aileekun, are you the doctor from Saudi?. Where is your lawani?. Why come here, YOU WILL TAKE ME TO SAUDI ARABIA!.
No problem, I will rule from there!
I have general Anthony or is it Anthony general, he hee heee Anthony general from Honduras car heee heeee
Very perfect liar!, he lies more than the devil !. Fact! Guinness Book of world’s record.
(Walks weakly, sleeps on the bed)
Doctor from Saudi, I need life support!
( jumps from the bed) Wait a minute, do we live here in per seconds or per minute
Yes! where is my cabinet, where I put my pants, my condom, a forty year bread and my loud megaphone of lies.( carrying an imaginary luggage)
My megaphone ooooooo, ohh ohh ohh. Very useful! , useful to me but useless to the house. One that rebrands waste product. Rebrands my gutter! and rebrands the maggot that comes out of my toilet!. What do you expect! I need more mad people in my CABINET THAN I AM SANE.
For the love of sanity, I know my mistake. That is my mistake!, I AM WITH A DEPUTY THAT TAKES THE DICTIONARY MEANING AWAY SUDDENLY!. Anytime he is deputy, you know now..., something happens to the oga. I will not hand over!. I will die!, I know I will die, everybody will die. But I will die with my post!. A keeper at the goal post, a stamp at the tip of a tattered envelope.
Hand over?, hand over ke, to that one?, come and cut my hand
Doctor! Doctor!, I am still on life support, per second or per minute?
Go and warn the go-warns anb the barber- and gigi’s that I am still in government, though I cannot recognise. When I was well,I did not recognise anything, now that I am sick what is the big deal with taking a masters degree in unrecognition, and the marijuana of agbada agenda?.
Ehn was it seven, eight or nine points, leave me! Write whatever you want, lecturer will mark whatever he wants
Yes those lecturers, lecturers in primary schools!
They fight!, ASSSU or ASSAULT or what do you call them, they demand for money to teach. let them pass students,Erohhhh! . Three point agenda! Fail the students , sleep with the students and strike for more money.
People are mad oooo!
I don’t know which is more effective with them and the water guard
My boat, one of my very big boats!
Missed on the water. They said it flew away,
Imagine! price giving day? Organised by my company that makes law.
They award one of themselves, at least when you praise a father for blowing up another man’s house.
Job well done! by the many dunces; mumu.
The boko boko and haram haram- newspapers are selling!- good for the economy!
Something must happen that adds salt, magi, epo, eja, meat, curry, yam flour, okro, garri, sugar and some f i n e ashes to the ever stirring porridge.
Bitter Life for Rural Women, and when she dies, there is a campaign, soliciting for Ghana must go.
DOCTOR! Dockita! Duck , doh doh
Am I still on life support or am I supporting lives?
(Footsteps, Door opening sounds)
Madman: yeh! They are coming!, this cannot happen to my government(paces round a little)
Saudi doctor, oya lets go, carry my life support
(Goes under the bed).
A madman in a psychiatric. A bed, on one side and an adjacent table. He is wearing a heavily stained white top, a shoe on one leg and a different slipper on the other , a sock on the slipper leg, a tight knickers. A tattered hair. There is a tattered news paper on the table.
Madman: life is made of stones, even boastful humans are nothing but clay
shattered in their graves. One day the clay pot will break. I need a
break says the clay pot, so he retires. Retires like an army general.
(jumps on the bed) long since the battles have gone and the guns
(displays his hands as if he is about to shoot, immediately runs to
the other side of the bed) don’t shoot please don’t shoot me. Don’t
you know me, Don’t you know me!( runs back to the soldiers
side) I know you, only when I take away your human rice, your
human beings, you bloody human beans.
(pauses) soldiers are the best you know, not this agbada agbada men. Let me think for all of you, since all of you are mad anyway!. The devil stained my shovel is better than the new soap washing it. The amala without soup, in rancour, is better than smiling in hungry disguise.
I am sick ooo, BBC, EN TII EH EH, WHATAVER, BLA BLA BLA, PEE DRI PEE, Air CONDISHIONER, yangan yangan yangan. Invite me to the state house, I will mistake it for a toilet like you.
You! wura, wara , jara jara.
Labe ile mi when I AM NOT MAD?, the doctors said that my illness is expensive . At what expense? Oh oh, Saudi here I come!
Common ta le vu, get out! I don’t want a French doctor , before you find contracts in oil and gas, gassing all of us with your oyinbo fart. We are thin here oo, we are not fat, we have kidney problem, skin cancer, pericardium ditties, cholera, leprosy, et al et al, pick your choice.
Salam aleikun, salam aileekun, are you the doctor from Saudi?. Where is your lawani?. Why come here, YOU WILL TAKE ME TO SAUDI ARABIA!.
No problem, I will rule from there!
I have general Anthony or is it Anthony general, he hee heee Anthony general from Honduras car heee heeee
Very perfect liar!, he lies more than the devil !. Fact! Guinness Book of world’s record.
(Walks weakly, sleeps on the bed)
Doctor from Saudi, I need life support!
( jumps from the bed) Wait a minute, do we live here in per seconds or per minute
Yes! where is my cabinet, where I put my pants, my condom, a forty year bread and my loud megaphone of lies.( carrying an imaginary luggage)
My megaphone ooooooo, ohh ohh ohh. Very useful! , useful to me but useless to the house. One that rebrands waste product. Rebrands my gutter! and rebrands the maggot that comes out of my toilet!. What do you expect! I need more mad people in my CABINET THAN I AM SANE.
For the love of sanity, I know my mistake. That is my mistake!, I AM WITH A DEPUTY THAT TAKES THE DICTIONARY MEANING AWAY SUDDENLY!. Anytime he is deputy, you know now..., something happens to the oga. I will not hand over!. I will die!, I know I will die, everybody will die. But I will die with my post!. A keeper at the goal post, a stamp at the tip of a tattered envelope.
Hand over?, hand over ke, to that one?, come and cut my hand
Doctor! Doctor!, I am still on life support, per second or per minute?
Go and warn the go-warns anb the barber- and gigi’s that I am still in government, though I cannot recognise. When I was well,I did not recognise anything, now that I am sick what is the big deal with taking a masters degree in unrecognition, and the marijuana of agbada agenda?.
Ehn was it seven, eight or nine points, leave me! Write whatever you want, lecturer will mark whatever he wants
Yes those lecturers, lecturers in primary schools!
They fight!, ASSSU or ASSAULT or what do you call them, they demand for money to teach. let them pass students,Erohhhh! . Three point agenda! Fail the students , sleep with the students and strike for more money.
People are mad oooo!
I don’t know which is more effective with them and the water guard
My boat, one of my very big boats!
Missed on the water. They said it flew away,
Imagine! price giving day? Organised by my company that makes law.
They award one of themselves, at least when you praise a father for blowing up another man’s house.
Job well done! by the many dunces; mumu.
The boko boko and haram haram- newspapers are selling!- good for the economy!
Something must happen that adds salt, magi, epo, eja, meat, curry, yam flour, okro, garri, sugar and some f i n e ashes to the ever stirring porridge.
Bitter Life for Rural Women, and when she dies, there is a campaign, soliciting for Ghana must go.
DOCTOR! Dockita! Duck , doh doh
Am I still on life support or am I supporting lives?
(Footsteps, Door opening sounds)
Madman: yeh! They are coming!, this cannot happen to my government(paces round a little)
Saudi doctor, oya lets go, carry my life support
(Goes under the bed).
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